Earlier this year, a viral CNN story broke about a woman who lost her life savings to a man she met on a dating app — only to find out he was part of a criminal network running dozens of similar scams using AI-generated profiles.
Sadly, her story is not unique. At Privin, our team of private investigators is seeing a dramatic rise in these scams as new technology makes it easier than ever to fake love — and harder to spot the red flags.
The romance starts off as usual. In the beginning, everything feels perfect. They text you every morning. They remember the little things. They say all the right words. But somewhere along the way, something starts to feel… off.
Over the past few years, we have worked with countless individuals who thought they had found “the one,” only to discover they were being emotionally and financially manipulated.
Romance scams are more common—and more sophisticated—than ever in 2025. If you are wondering whether your connection is real or just really good at pretending, this guide will walk you through the most common signs to watch for and what to do if you suspect something is wrong.
What Is a Romance Scam?
According to the Federal Trade Commission, romance scammers stole over $1.3 billion from Americans in 2023 alone — and that number is only expected to rise in 2025 as scammers take advantage of new AI-driven tools to impersonate real people and emotionally manipulate their victims.
A romance scam is a form of online fraud where a scammer builds a relationship with a victim, gains their trust, and then exploits that trust for money, information, or access. These scams often start on dating apps, social media platforms, or even through email and gaming sites.
While most romance scams were once easy to spot—obvious fake profiles or too-good-to-be-true stories—today’s scammers are far more convincing. They may use AI-generated profiles, deepfake video calls, and scripts refined through years of trial and error.
Romance scammers do not just steal money—they break hearts, destroy trust, and sometimes leave their victims in deep emotional and financial distress.
How to Spot a Romance Scammer: 7 Warning Signs
If you are wondering how to tell if someone is scamming you online, these warning signs can help you separate real relationships from romance scams.
1. They Move Too Fast Emotionally
If someone tells you they love you after just a few conversations—or starts talking about marriage or moving in together within a week—that is a major romance scam warning sign. This tactic, known as love bombing, is designed to lower your defenses and create a false sense of intimacy quickly.
Red Flag: They use overly emotional language and future plans early on, even if you have never met.
Privin Tip: Take screenshots and keep a timeline of what was said and when. If someone is moving unusually fast, having a record of your interactions can help you reflect more clearly—or provide helpful context if you choose to get an expert opinion later.
2. They Avoid Video Calls or Meeting In Person
In 2025, video calls are standard in online relationships. If your online partner always has an excuse not to FaceTime, Zoom, or meet in real life, be wary. Some scammers even use deepfake technology to create fake videos that look convincing—until you notice the audio lag or strange lighting.
Red Flag: They say their camera is broken, they are “too shy,” or they appear distorted or robotic in video chats.
Privin Tip: If someone refuses to verify themselves through a simple live video or a personalized clip, that is worth noting. Keep your requests reasonable, and trust your judgment if the excuses start piling up. Ask them to send a quick video holding up a specific object or saying a custom phrase. If they dodge it, investigate further.
3. There Is Always a Crisis—and It Requires Money
This is the classic online dating scam. Your partner suddenly needs help: they are stuck overseas, a family member is sick, or they are facing eviction. They say they do not know who else to turn to, and you are their only hope.
Red Flag: They ask for money through gift cards, cryptocurrency, or wire transfer—and promise to pay you back later.
Privin Tip: Be cautious with financial help—even small amounts. If you feel unsure, pause and talk it through with someone you trust. Scammers rely on urgency and emotion to override logic. Never send funds without verifying the story.
4. They Claim to Be Abroad or in the Military
Romance scammers often say they are deployed, working offshore, or traveling for business. This makes it easier to explain their lack of in-person meetings or delays in communication. One of the most common dating site scams involves military impersonation.
To combat this, the U.S. Army Criminal Investigation Division issued an official warning about criminals pretending to be soldiers. These scammers use fake military credentials and photos to lure victims into sending money under the guise of travel, communication, or deployment expenses. Victims often believe they are helping a real service member — until the truth surfaces.
Red Flag: They say they are in a restricted area and cannot video chat, or they have “poor reception.”
Privin Tip: Take note of inconsistencies. A genuine person will not be offended by gentle questions or requests to verify basic details. To check the authenticity of their story, you can hire someone to do a background check on them. Investigators can verify military records, deployment details, and travel activity—so you know whether you’re talking to a real person or someone playing a role.
5. They Ask for Financial or Personal Information
They may start with small asks—”Can you send me a little to cover a fee?”—but the requests escalate. Some ask for bank login details under the guise of “helping with a transaction.” Others go after identity details like your mother’s maiden name, birthdate, or address.
Red Flag: They pressure you to share sensitive data, and get defensive if you hesitate.
Privin Tip: If you’ve shared personal or financial information—even just once—it is worth checking if that trust was misplaced. Stop communication immediately and seek out help. Our investigators can discreetly trace where your details may have gone, what risks you face, and how to take action.
6. Their Social Media Presence Seems Suspicious
Romance scammers often use stolen photos and fake bios. If you reverse-image search their profile pictures and find them connected to another name—or dozens of identical profiles—that is a clear red flag. Lack of genuine comments or interaction on their posts is another sign.
Red Flag: Their photos look professional, but their profiles have few friends, followers, or organic activity.
Privin Tip: Try a reverse image search and look at the profile’s activity. If something feels off—like few friends, limited posts, or repetitive content—it likely is.
7. You Have a Gut Feeling Something Is Off
Many of our clients say they knew something was wrong—but they ignored their intuition. If you find yourself making excuses for inconsistencies, questioning your own memory, or feeling guilt-tripped into silence, it is time to pause.
Red Flag: You feel emotionally exhausted and confused, but afraid to step away or confront them.
Privin Tip: Trust your instincts. If something feels off, slow down and investigate whether the person is deserving of your trust or they are just love bombing you to exploit your trust. Your gut feeling is one of your best tools—listen to it.
What to Do If You Suspect a Romance Scam
If you are seeing any of the signs above, here is what you should do immediately:
- Stop all communication. Do not engage further or send more money.
- Document everything. Save texts, emails, transaction records, and screenshots.
- Report the scam. Notify the dating platform, social media network, and a relevant authority. You can file a report with the FTC or the Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3). If you’re outside the U.S., check with your national cybercrime unit or fraud reporting agency.
- Talk to a professional. A licensed private investigator like Privin can verify identities, uncover hidden accounts, and confirm suspicions with discretion and speed. Learn more about our Cyber Crime Investigation Service here.
Most importantly: Do not blame yourself. Romance scammers are expert manipulators. Recognizing the scam and taking action shows strength, not weakness.
Final Thoughts
We hope this guide has helped you better understand how to spot a romance scammer and recognize the common red flags that so many people miss. At Privin, our work with romance scam victims has shown just how calculated and emotionally manipulative these schemes can be.
You are not alone—and you are not foolish for falling for someone who seemed perfect. Romance scams prey on emotional vulnerability, and the people behind them are highly skilled at deception. But knowledge is power. Whether you are questioning a current relationship or want to know how to tell if someone is scamming you online, trust your instincts and take action early.
At Privin, we support individuals across the country with discreet, professional investigations into online dating scams, romance scammers, and fraud. From background checks to digital footprint analysis, our goal is to help you feel safe, informed, and in control.💼 Think something feels off? Trust your instinct—and let us verify the rest.
📞 Contact Privin today for a confidential investigation and the truth you deserve.
